


How to ged rid of your lover

by Kuroi_Tsuki



Category: Naruto
Genre: Insecurity, Light Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:29:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27660707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kuroi_Tsuki/pseuds/Kuroi_Tsuki
Summary: Iruka has been together with Kakashi for a some time now. He still doesn't understand why someone as awesomeas Kakashi is interested in a mere boring teacher like himself. It's just to good to be true. That's why he carefully devices a plan. However, the further the preparations advance, the more anxious Iruka becomes. Iruka is so stressed out that he unconsciously starts distancing himself more and more from Kakashi. He is also completely oblivious of the fact that Kakashi starts suspecting that something is amiss. Until it's too late. That was definitely not the way this was supposed to go.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka
Comments: 1
Kudos: 34





	How to ged rid of your lover

**Author's Note:**

> This is the promised addition to my work ["Let me down slowly"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25075963), this time from Iruka's point of view. I would recommend reading "Let me down slowly" first, since that was the original idea (and I'm not as satisfied with this new story as with the first). But in the end it's up to you. One spoilers the other, there's no way around. I hope you enjoy it anyway.  
> Oh and sorry for the slightly awkward summery. It seems that I'm not so good with words right now.

Iruka and Kakashi had been together for quite a while now and Iruka couldn’t be happier. Who would have thought that a genius like Hatake Kakashi would be interested in him, a mere school teacher. Their initial getting together consisted of a huge number of totally awkward definitely-not-a-date dates, because none of them could imagine their feelings for the other would be reciprocated. But after an awful night at the bar, initiated by their friends, who had grown tired of their “game”, followed by awful drunken sex and an even more awful, so-embarrassing-I’m-gonna-die-if-my-hangover-doesn’t-kill-me-first morning after, they finally got their shit together.  
Since then they were a not overly public but definitely happy couple. Of course their were arguments. Iruka was often annoyed with Kakashi about his weird antics and quirks, at least on the outside that is. On the inside, he secretly loved each and every of Kakashi’s peculiarities and wouldn’t change them for the world, although of course from time to time they were grinding on his nerves. So to preserve their personal happiness in a world in which stability was always fragile, he decided to give to Kakashi the most precious thing he had to offer for their anniversary.  
He had it all framed out way ahead of their special day. He had decided on a place and time and on whom he was gonna ask for help. However, somehow truths were spread almost as fast as rumours it seemed. As Iruka was well known and loved throughout the village, the more people caught wind of his plan, the more people decided to get involved in their favourite teachers happiness. Everything was getting a little out of hand somehow, which made Iruka’s stress level rise rapidly. Although of course everyone was sworn to secrecy, the more people involved, the higher the risk of someone accidentally letting something slip. 

Had Iruka been less worried about Kakashi discovering his plan, he might have recognized his boyfriend‘s growing anxiety. But as it was, Iruka was too concerned about being found out to see the signs. Kakashi was, after all, an elite ninja, incredibly perceptive of even the smallest things most people wouldn’t even see, if they happened directly in front of their noses. And, he was unfortunately, also very insecure about closer social interactions and personal commitments.  
Anyway, without intending to or realizing it, Iruka became increasingly uncommunicative and withdrawn. And he tended to verbally lash out more than he usually did, for almost no reason at all. He was known to have a temper, but… … …  
For example, there was this one situation, when Kakashi, who seemed to just have returned from a mission, sneaked up on Iruka in order to surprise him – something he often did and which Iruka had always been looking forward to, even though he always scolded his boyfriend for it – when Iruka simply snapped. He had just been talking to one of their mutual friends about some detail concerning his proposal, notebook open in his hand and all when Kakashi all of a sudden touched his shoulder. Iruka was so tense that he immediately yelled at Kakashi when the latter asked about what they were doing. Of course he immediately regretted his outburst and apologised to Kakashi who seemed confused and taken aback by his lover's reaction. However, he did not recognize the extent of damage already done to Kakashi’s psyche, too absorbed he was in his own fear and angry at himself for his lack of attention to his surroundings, which could have ruined in one second weeks of stressful preparation.  
The more Kakashi enquired about Iruka’s late stays at the academy, (partially invented) after-work meetings and increasing lack of communication, the more withdrawn and irritated Iruka became. On the inside, the teacher was feeling more and more miserable. By that time, he hardly slept at all and on top of that, or maybe because of it, it became harder and harder to not become entangled in contradictions regarding all the – well not exactly lies, white lies at best, were they? – he kept telling Kakashi to fend of his boyfriend’s curiosity, especially after said boyfriend started talking to their friends and acquaintances about Iruka’s odd behaviour. Iruka’s dangerously high and still rising stress level was now even cause of concern to his friends.  
The evening before the appointed day – another late evening at the academy, he had told Kakashi – Iruka was such a mess, that everyone involved decided it was time to remove him from the scene, for all of their sakes. Being nothing but a bundle of nerves, he was driving everybody crazy – actually had for several hours by then – and no help to anyone, but rather at risk of blowing his carefully devised plan himself last minute.  
Tenzo grabbed him quite literally by the collar, dragging him to a bar at the far end of Konoha, a district he know neither Iruka nor Kakashi usually frequented. There he got a bottle of sake from the bar and quite literally forced the first cup down Iruka’s throat before the latter was even able to comprehend what was even happening to him, knowing that Iruka would have refused because he didn’t want to ruin Kakashi’s (and his) special day by being hung-over.  
After the second cup, Iruka slowly started to relax, happily joking and laughing about the stories Tenzo told him of a younger Kakashi. The conversation went from stories about Kakashi to how shocked Kakashi would probably be the next day, to funny stories from the rather awkward beginning of their relationship and then back to Tenzo’s memories of a much younger Kakashi and how much he had changed since then. When Iruka, after another 2 or three cups, had become rather inhibited, on the verge of being outright drunk, Tenzo leaned in on him from behind, whispering a seemingly especially embarrassing anecdote into Iruka’s ear in order to switch the teacher’s sake with juice inconspicuously. 

On the next day, everything proceeded as planned. After a short night on Tenzo’s couch, because in the end Tenzo hadn’t trusted Iruka’s state enough to send him home to Kakashi*, Iruka waited nervously at the academy, everyone else well hidden on the perimeter and ready to act on sign.  
When Kakashi finally entered, Iruka walked towards his boyfriend to draw him into a hug. What he hadn’t expected was Kakashi, in a completely unreadably mood, keeping him at arms length.

“Kakashi...” he began, but was interrupted by his lover.  
“Iruka, we have to talk. I know … not an easy person … grateful for the time you let me spend by your side… happy … way into my heart…  
I think I know what you’re going to say. [I saw you at the bar yesterday when I was taking a walk, and] I overheard part of your conversation… “.  
Iruka was only half listening to what Kakashi was saying because his mind was in no state to process any kind of even half-complicated thoughts, but snapped to attention when Kakashi revealed that he already knew about the surprise Iruka had gone to great lengths to keep a secret. And now everything was ruined. Iruka didn’t know what to feel or how to respond. He was overwhelmed by waves of disappointment, sadness, disbelieve and many more emotions, all of which must have reflected on his face, judging by his lover’s expression.  
“Kakashi… “, Iruka started to blush. “I’m so sorry… I never wanted you to find out like this… …“ and was interrupted by Kakashi again.  
“Don’t apologize”, Kakashi said before Iruka could continue. “I know you never wanted [to hurt me]. But sometimes hard and fast is better than gently and slow. Don’t make this any more painful for both of us.” Here Iruka began to actually listen to what Kakashi was saying. As his mind started to process Kakashi’s words, the myriad of emotions he had felt a minute ago were slowly replaced by utter confusion.  
“Kakashi, what… “.  
“Iruka, let me finish. It’s OK that you found someone else. Everything we had was too good to be true anyway… “, Kakashi’s voice carried the same mix of sadness, disappointment and hurt Iruka thought his face must have reflected only moments before. Understanding dawned on him.  
“You know I love you, in a way I never thought I’d ever be able to. But that also means I want you to be happy, so I’m letting you go. You don’t have to stay with me out of consideration for my feelings any longer. You don’t have to pretend …”  
Kakashi continued his speech while Iruka’s brain tried to find the right words to correct his lover’s misinterpretation of events. His thoughts now clear and his nervousness gone, Kakashi’s anxious babbling suddenly reminded him of his students, desperately trying to defend their foolish actions, so he reacted accordingly.  
“Hatake Kakashi!!” Kakashi’s next words seemed to be stuck in his throat.  
“They call you a genius. But you are the most insufferable, dense, utterly stupid, super cute and most adorable person I know.”, Iruka’s expression changed from stern to fond.  
Now it was Kakashi’s time to blink.  
Iruka continued “Did you really think I’m letting you get away so easily?” How the hell had Kakashi reached the conclusion that Iruka was going to leave him? Kakashi’s next words painfully provided the answer.  
“Iruka, what the hell are you talking about? Stop playing games with me. You’ve practically been acting all weird, trying to avoid me more and more for a month now, slowly blocking me out of your life.”. Kakashi became increasingly annoyed as he talked, almost yelling now. “You’ve even outright lied to me. Academy emergency meeting my ass. As I said, I saw you yesterday. Relaxing and enjoying yourself, with another person hanging from your shoulders, practically nibbling at your neck…. “  
Iruka groaned and looked at Kakashi with a mix of annoyance and guilt and whatever else emotion he made no longer any effort to process. Had he really been that intolerable? And how could he have been so oblivious to his lover’s state of mind? Why hadn’t he realized? He had meant to make his lover happy, drive away his demons. Instead he had fed them, both, by his actions and by his lack thereof. How could he make this right again? Iruka felt like there were no words. So instead, all he did was whistle. And so his carefully devised plan was finally brought to fruition.  
Everyone took their assigned positions. There was a bang and lots and lots of smoke. Gai grabbed Kakashi by the shoulder to prevent him from running. When the smoke had cleared, the air was filled with shiny glitter, and the gym was suddenly full of people who held up the colourful, banner his current and former students had creatively helped him decorate, saying “Happy anniversary”.  
When Kakashi looked back to Iruka, obviously dumbdounded and silent, Iruka knelt before him smiling at him fondly.  
“Hatake Kakashi, insufferably dumb genius that you are. I know that you are full of flaws, always late, reading porn all day and always full of mischief. And I love every single of your strange, adorable antics. I wouldn’t want to miss them for a single day for the rest of my life.”  
With that, he reached inside his vest to retrieve a small nondescript box, which he slowly opened.  
“Hatake Kakashi, will you let me suffer your presence for the rest of my live?”  
Inside the box was a simple silver ring. Iruka had first wanted to buy something more fancy, but while desperately browsing the mass of options, he realized that it simply did not matter. They didn’t need a fancy token to remind them of their love for each other. 

“Will you marry me?”. Iruka’s heart was hammering wildly in his chest as he closely watched Kakashi.  
Kakashi’s eyes widened. He gaped open-mouthed, all eyes in the room now trained on him.  
When he didn’t answer, a new fear took hold of Iruka’s heart. Something that hadn’t even occurred to him. What if all the stress had been in vain. What if, (after everything,) Kakashi didn’t want to stay by Iruka’s side? The thought nearly broke Iruka’s heart.  
“Kakashi? … … … “, he no more than whispered. The hint of sadness in Iruka’s voice must have startled Kakashi awake again.  
Suddenly, without a world, he grabbed both of Iruka’s hands, pulled him to his feet and drew him in for a kiss that to Iruka conveyed all the feelings his lover didn’t seem to be able to put into words.  
When their lips finally parted, Kakashi nodded with a smile and a hardly audible “Yes, I will”, hugging Iruka tightly.  
Iruka felt an incredibly surge of relieve. His response was drowned out in a wave of cheers.

Omake:  
*Plus Tenzo might actually have realized that the night before, they had been watched and by whom and he might or might not have leaned in on Iruka a little more intimately than necessary as a kind of revenge for all the times his senpai had teased or embarrassed him in the past… Well, at least he had the decency to warn Gai about what to expect when picking up Kakashi the next day.


End file.
